Recent twitter entries...


Sorry (Its been 2 years of love)

"being miserable is an option. being happy is a choice"

This entry is connected on my friendster blog entry "Its been a year of love"

Cut loose and I'm moving on... Again. I thought that loving someone is enough for you to be loved back by a person - but it's not. I was wrong. She hurt me like no one did. She threw everything acting like she's innocent. She is. It's my fault. I choose to love her even she cannot love me. At the end of the road i told her "May buhay din ako ---., Di lang sayo umiikot mundo ko" I cried that night. I was shaking hearing those words from her "Di ko na matandaan kung lumabas ba sa bibig ko yung mga salitang yun. Joke lang yun. Naniwala ka naman agad., eh bakit kung sinabi ko ba na hintayin mo ako pag 50 na ako hihintayin mo pa din ba ako? di ko alam na sineryoso mo yun" with laughs on her mouth while she was saying it naputol yung phone call.

That's it. Tears went out and my breathing became harder.

Sumandal ako saglit sa pader habang umiiyak.,pinunasan ko luha ko tapos dumiretso ako sa kwarto at humiga.

I sms her - "okay na. yun lang din naman tatanong ko sayo kung magkita man tayo....Nice joke..."
she sms me - "Nu kba. Di ko akalain talaga na sineryoso mo yun. Sori"
I replied again - "Di., okay na.. okay lang..sarap kaya..salamat"
she replied - "sori"

I cried that night. I was hurt so bad. All i can do is weep under my pillow..

The next things that happened after that...

Jowanne told me her feelings and i laughed at her.. (I felt sorry. Natatakot ako., Di ko alam kung dapat ko bang sabihin na ganun din ako sayo. I dont want to hurt you. Hindi sa hindi kita mahal. "I don't want to love a person dahil kakaiyak ko lang kagabi dahil sa love..." I care for you.,  let's take time to know each other more.

Aniyah came. She's a lie. She's a dream - for a young sweet love i was looking for.

Zeth is here. My HS partner during prom night. She told me "Hinanap kaya kita... Sana mas maaga kita hinanap" . Hinanap ko din siya even before pa. But this time around na nahanap na nya ako., I don't know what to feel. I just don't know what to feel.

Im in so much pain. I just can't love. I need to find my own way back into the world., so called love.

"Sorry kung nakasakit ako..alam ko wala akong karapatan manakit ng ibang tao dahil nasaktan ako sa kahapon ko"

Jacque Bermejo's Defense

Jacque Bermejo's Official Statement (citation here)

I am issuing this statement to clear my name in the current controversy in which I allegedly posted a highly insensitive and offensive message on the social networking website, Facebook, in relation to the victims of typhoon Ondoy that recently struck parts of the Philippines.

About two years ago, an anonymous source created these accounts using my identity, posting my personal details, my real pictures captioned roughly and attacking other people. Because of these incidents, I reported such abuses and sent my credentials to the administrators of such sites, particularly Facebook. I have been abused and am still being abused online in social networking websites such as Facebook, Friendster, Multiply etc.

In the early stages, I was advised by close friends to ignore the situation, saying this would simply go away. Unfortunately, it has not stopped. Hence, I filed a complaint with the Dubai Police about eight months ago hoping they could help me with my problem. Should anyone wish to check my statement, my case is still under investigation with said authorities.

Time passed and these sites continued to generate malicious, obscene and cruel messages that are widely exposed and relayed to the public under my name.

Yesterday, September 27th 2009, I received phone calls from my close friends regarding very alarming posts in the above mentioned websites that directly offended flood victims as a result of typhoon Ondoy..

These malicious statement(s) which are posted under account names Jacque or Jackie are not of my doing. It is unfortunate that such statements were maliciously attributed to me and I do sympathize and understand the adverse and somehow verbally violent reaction that has been elicited by such insensitive statements or posts. Rest assured, I have taken every legal step that can be done in this regard.

I too, have become a victim as much as those who may have lost their lives and properties to such a devastating natural calamity. This recent controversy has greatly affected my reputation, my family, and my friends. I am devastated and shocked at the extent my character, my personal information and private space have been violated.

I love you more than anything

"I love you more than anything"
By Oliver D. Lundag

It is so amazing when you are with me                           
I am breathless when you are not there for me               
The sounds of your voice revolves around me                
The sweetness of your care was captured me                  

The clouds move when the wind blows                           
When you look at me in your window                             
Your smile is like a beautiful rainbow                             
Light as the sun lights up my dark shadow                   

Once more you bring those smiles to me                           
I love it when you look straight back at me                   
If it supposed to be like this                                             
I will not ignore the chance to miss                                 

Once more you tell those three words to me                    
I love it when you straight up with honesty                 
When you say those things in my ear                                 
You always tell me what my heart wants to hear            

Wear your smile on your face                                              
Let's make things not hard to believe                                
Don't run away, you are the best place I can hide           
It is the best place when I'm by your side.                        

We can walk in the same direction                                  
You and I will feel this situation                                    
Forgiveness will be our satisfaction                                
With you my heart felt devotion                                      

The river might die in the summer                                   
But I will never die as a partner                                        
My heart will burn like a fire                                             
With you I want to live my life forever                                          

You are my strength at all times                                       
I want to eat with you at lunchtime’s                            
Have a date with you in dinnertimes                              
And share my feelings with you at downtimes                              

Sometimes I have been careless                                         
But you pull me out from darkness                                  
And save me from being senseless                                     
Thanks for your wonderful kindness                              

Without you I am nothing                                                
Thanks for keeping me breathing                                     
I know that this poem has an ending                                
But I love you more than anything...            

> Thanks Oli. Nice work ;)

Ondoy - GO TO HELL!

"Mabuti ng ikaw yung tumulong...
               kaysa ikaw yung tinutulungan"
                                                -mama (Pag me nanghihingi ng abuloy para sa patay)

"Super sarap mag swimming sa baha". Kala ko puro sarap lang. Wala kaming kuryente. Nawalan ng signal globe at sun sa bahay. Nakainom kami ng "Grandma at Redhorse" ang galing mag backstroke ng pinsan ko sa baha. The next day? Me kuryente na. Nakita ko yung video sa San Mateo., natameme na ako.. Ang saya ko kahapon. So tragic pala for many filipinos.,sorry. I begin to worry. Naalala ko si Joan "Jowanne" Manandeg., I care for this girl. Her family lives in Santolan, Pasig..All i can do now is pray for her..and somehow pray that this blog entry may help. Images are from "Ondoy - you fucking asshole" from


Tons of places to drop your help. Either look for "Sagip Kapamilya or Kapuso Foundation" Or if you can personally go to Cainta and Try and see and give how much you can help.

"Give what you can share...Spam na kung SPAM.."

Give it to the authorities. RED CROSS!

Jowanne asn ka na? ..worried na po ako...haaay

Love Program


import body.heart.soul.complexlife;

public class Complexlife extends InternalHeartAche {

private String YOU = "",ME = "";

private void Complexlife(){//start
YOU = (charm *) allocate (sizeof (myHeart));//You capture me with your charm
this.setSize(YOU);//you are in my heart now
while (LOVE !=  NULL){//while our love is not equal to zero
DISTANCE = new DISTANCE (distance);//pair distance
CARE = new CARE(YOU);//I care for you
MISS = new MISS(YOU);//I miss you
CRAZY = new CRAZY(ME);//crazy for you
catch(nullpointer exception You){}//I'll catch you
if (TEARS > SMILE){//but while tears is greater than smile
HATE++; //hate  
LOVE- -; //love lessen
TIME++; //time to think  
catch(nullpointer exception Me){// I'll still catch you
DIE = new DIE(ME);//I might die without you
return Complexlife;//start over again
 *** END of Complexlife

Thanks Oli. Great work! :D


Sinabi ko na kahapon
Ikay aking lilimutin
Ngunit ito ako ngayon
Nagbabalik ang damdamin
Makinig ka sana
Ayaw kitang pilitin
Aking winiwika
Nais ko lamang ay iyong dinggin
Di ko na alam kung ano pa ang kayang gawin
Luluhod na lang? Taimtim na mananalangin
Sana pag gising ko bukas
Wala na ang sakit na dalahin
Patuloy na mabubuhay hanggang
Luha ko ay kusang pawiin
Panahon ang tanging susukat sa akin
Dalawang bagay lang ang iisipin
Patuloy kang mahalin o tumalikod
at tuluyan kang limutin.

Asa ka naman?


 "Hindi porke't madalas mong ka-chat, kausap sa telepono, kasama sa mga lakad o ka-text ng wantusawa eh may gusto sayo at magkakatuluyan kayo. Meron lang talagang mga taong sadyang friendly, sweet, flirt, malandi, pa-fall o paasa."  -Bob Ong.

This is real right? sometimes it's hard to see things the other way around. "Di porke tinext ka nya ng gudmorning, gudaftie, gudeve, kumaen ka na, ingat ka, tc, mwah and etc., eh mauulul ka na" hehehe.. There are just people who love to care for other people. Cheesy diba? Yeah, but people like these are just born to be sweet. Sometimes.. Many times. If you fall for these kind of people better start praying now that he or she is not someone just bugging around and trying to play people's heart. But they love playing people's heart and at the end of the day you fall, you loose. Maybe because your a somewhat kind of a stupid person who believe in simple words. I did believed before. I thought it was a somewhat "Motibo" but i was wrong. All she said to me is "Mabait lang talaga ako", What did i do? "Napalunok na lang ako at sinabi sa sarili ko - sobrang bait mo naman" 

Naisip ko tuloy:
1. Mura lang ang unli kaya masarap makipagtxtmate ng madaming madami (Kiti-kitxt type)
2. Me Sun Cellular naman. Tawag to the Max.(Sunnatic Type)
3. Mura lng ang rent sa computer shop. Mag YM ka man o mag FS ka o Facebook pa o twitter pa. So Affordable. (Internet Man)
4. Masarap mang Flirt lalo nat uto-uto naman ung tao.(Filthy Flirt)
5. Masarap ka kasama kasi mahilig ka manlibre. Libre mo ako ha! DQ!hahaha (Libre Type)
6. Masarap mang gate crush ng YM. Open mo account mo ng madami "ASL" to the max ka lang.(ASL dido)
7. Masarap mag pa asa. Lalo na't wala naman talagang pagasa! (Paasa Type)
8. "Wala akong magagawa masarap kaya yung me nagmamahal sayo" Kahit madami! (Lovapaloozer)
9. Lakad sa mall. Turo. Papa-ble. (Sugar Dad/Mom Type).
10. Masarap manakit. lalo na't nasaktan ako dati (Revenge Type)

Isa ka ba sa mga to? Asaness ka naman! Hahaha

Falling and Falling


Oh i miss her so
I think of falling again
But id rather say no

Her smile captures my heart
And i don't know how to start

Probably ill just keep my mouth shut.
Oh i cant breathe., I'm tongue tied
Everything in my world stops.

She's one in a million
meeting her gives you
thousands of reason

She's Intelligent
but sometimes she acts just like
an innocent.

Falling and Falling
Whew...I just cant 
continue my breathing..

p.s. Naks! Miss u Kreng :D haayst..hehehe.. tablan ka nmn ng pambobola ko! hahaha... hehehe...yan ah.hahaha. DQ ko? hahaha...

Cute mo dito...hahaha.. pa Brownies Temptations ka nmn!
hehehe..asn na c mik mik?hahaha

Yaman nito taga marilao... ganda ng bahay! hahahaha!

It was not your fault, Never was any of this your fault, It was mine.....


Dear Loved One,
I hate myself for hurting you,
I was selfish to have done so,
Selfish to hurt myself,
Selfish to hurt you,
I never thought about you as I should have,
I should have thought more,
Thought more about how it would effect you,
But no,
I did no such thing,
Now I regret it,
I regret dieing,
I regret taking a life,
Taking my own life,
And hurting you,
Now you are alone,
And your hurt,
No longer can I help you,
No longer can I comfort you,
No longer can I be there for you,
Dear Loved One,
I'm sorry,
It was not your fault,
Never was any of this your fault,
It was mine.....

Astig Oli. Lufet! Thanks!...ehehehe



"Ooops. Ang Cheesy nyo. Iba BLOG ko yan! lol"



I had so much young love the day that you walked into my life. A young love that ive been longing for. I had sleepless nights because of you. I remember the night that you asked me if im a good kisser and all i answered is "NO", hahahah. Because im really not. May be.

Your young love is so sweet that ants would be begging for our sweets. I love the way you love me. I love when call me "baby". lol. I dont know if you're just playing around or any. I love those nights wherein ill fall asleep saying and hearing "I love you baby" then you'll say "Lapit ka dito" and "Yakapin mo ko". I love those nights that you act like a child not wanting me to hang up the phone and you want to sleep beside me. I love it when you told me that you've been sharing stories of me to mom.

You have so much young love in your heart that every guy will be begging for. Im happy,. you fill my heart with so much hapiness. Im so blessed.

Though sometimes your young love scare the hell out of me. Im afraid that soon this young love will grow and just leave. I want to see you grow. Be a step behind you and catch you everytime you fall.

May be i have such a good talent on making threading these sweet words that a young heart would fall into. May be. But i was never loved back the way that you are loving me now. So young, So sweet. So fresh. I want you to know how thankful i am that you were there. I fall for someone and write immortal words. That someone is you Annea.

Your young sweet love is longingly.

I fall for you Annea but Annea never existed on this dimension. Annea was just a part of my desire for a young love experience. Soon ill meet Annea and be with her. Soon ill sit on her arms and rest on her peacefully.

Im suffering from love. A love that was never real and could only happen in my dreams.

Isa, Dalawa, Tatlo

Sino ba itong kausap ko
Dinig ko ang tibok ng puso mo
Isa, dalawa, tatlo
Kamay ko ay hawakan mo
Di man kita nakikita
Akin namang nadarama
Tayo'y iisa, nangangarap
Pagtagpuin at magkasama
Tanaw ko na ang bukas
Sanay hindi na ito magwakas
Panaginip man o hindi
Ikaw lang ang tanging sanhi
Buhay ko'y naging makahulugan
Dinggin mo, ikaw lang ang
Tanging dahilan

Letter (In my frozen hand)

Your Letter in my Frozen Hand
by : Oliver Lundag

"I hold your letter in my frozen hand.. staring on the lines.. reminisce each and every time. Its freezing...i need your warm hands"


I hold your letter in my frozen hand
The last line was long, as long as it burns
My look carries on
With every word another feeling dies
I'm left here in the dark, no memories of you
I close my eyes, it's killing me
We die when love is dead, it's killing me
We lost a dream we never had
The world in silence should forever feel alone
'Cause we are gone and we will never overcome, it's over now
Vultures are waiting for what's left of us
What can we take? It all has no worth
If we lose our trust
They're coming closer, want you and me
I can feel their claws, let me go now
Try to break free, it's killing me
We die when love is dead, it's killing me
We lost a dream we never had
The world in silence should forever feel alone
'Cause we are gone and we will never overcome
It's over now, now, now

Astig! lol..Thanks dude for allowing me to post one of your masterpiece! nice writing.


"Pakawalan mo yung mga bagay na nakakasakit sa iyo kahit na pinasasaya ka nito. Wag mong hintayin ang araw na sakit na lang ang nararamdaman mo at iniwan ka na ng kasiyahan mo."

Bob Ong Words. Sarap :)

Isuko mo na lang habang may natitira pang pagmamahal sa puso mo. Kung totoong pagmamahal ang naramdaman mo for sure tumanim yun sa puso mo. "Real love is always deeply rooted to your heart" as i said. Cry as much as you can kasi you did love someone. After crying go back to the times na ramdam mo ang pagmamahal nya sayo. Smile. Fill your heart with great memories instead of being bitter because of so much pain.

Smile and believe that someway somehow you'll find all the reasons why painful things happen in someones life.

Say Thanks, for once you were loved by this person.

Be Happy and Keep fighting for tomorrow;)

Bookmarked from this blogsite(journal) : princesskumod

"Tada kimi wo aishiteru. Tada sorekadda yokatta noni"

Boy and Girl.txt (Hangover)

Boy: Helow
Girl: Oi
Boy: Musta, Asn ka?
Girl: Pauwi pa lng galing sa extra work. Sayang eh.
Boy: Ngek.Okay..Ingat
Girl: Salamat
Boy: Ur Welcome
Girl: Ano ginagawa mo?
Boy: Wala naman..nakahiga lang me iniicp.
Girl: Ahh..ano naman yun? sino?
Boy: Ikaw
Girl: haaay.nako ka.,wag ka nga epal
Boy: Di nga
Girl: Okay. Bahala ka sa buhay mo
----------------------after 5mins---------------------
Boy: Hehe..Nga pla..Regarding sa sinabi mo sakin dati? totoo ba yun?
Girl: Ano yun?
Boy: Yung sa Coffe Shop. Sabi mo hintayin kita..8 years from now. Totoo ba yun?
Girl: Ha? Sinabi ko yun? Hindi ko na matandaan kung lumabas nga ba yun sa bibig ko eh., Joke lang yun. hehe
Boy: Ganun?
Girl: Oo. Ikaw naman. Pano kung sabihin ko sayo na hintayin mo ako pag 50 na ako.. hihintayin mo pa din ako? Baliw! Joke lang yun!
Boy: Oo. Kasi mahal kita, Naniwala ako nung sabihin mo na hintayin kita eh.
Girl: Ganon? Sorry.Joke lng yun.
Girl: Sori tlga. Di ko alam na sineryoso mo pala yun.
Boy: Salamat
Girl: Sori
Sobrang sakit? Paano nagagawa ng ibang tao gawing joke lng ang puso at pagmamahal ng iba para sa kanila? hahaha....Ops? Di si basha at popoy yan. Hehehe
This writing is so simple. The boy loved the girl so unselfishly that he even believe on every words that the girl told her. But those words turned out to be the biggest joke of his miserable life. Now who gets to suffer on this joke? Both of them? but who suffered most? Who's fault is it? The boy who loved? The girl who joked?

Favorite DC Lines

Craving for perfect song lines that could slit your throat and cut your wrist?lol. Take some dosage of DC, wear a pair of sneakers. Sing and Die while listening to songs of Dashboard Confessionals! sOOoo EMO!

"We are the only ones who feel it. Tonight we drink. Tonight we dance. We are the last ones who can hear it...heaven is here" -heaven here

"You get one look. I'll show you something that the knife took. A bit too early for my own good. Now let's not speak of it again"  -dont wait

"When every move and each impulse brings clarity to stay like this is everything you’ll ever need" -rooftops and invitations

"Breathe, dont you want to breathe. I know that you are strong enough to handle what i need my capillaries scream. Theres nothing left to feed on my body needs a reason to cross that line will you carry me there one more time" -reason to believe

"Defense is paper thin, Just. One touch and I'll be in, too deep now to ever swim against the current so let me slip away" -vindicated

"As for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs and sit alone and you're making out. And as for me I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone, making out." -screaming infidelities

"Hand out the window floatin' on air just a flip of the wrist and im wavin' you goodbye" - so long, so long

"We're stronger where the strain had broken us and there is fight in us, I know that it will take more than
a heavy rain to silence us when there's so much for us. I know." - the widows peak

"So sneakers or flip-flops? I'm starting to panic, (wait wait) Remember she asked you, remember to breathe. and everything will be okay." -remember to breathe

"But for now I'll look so longingly, waiting... For you to want me, for you to need me, for you to notice me" -for you to notice

"Pouring over photographs. I'm living in your letters. Breathe deeply from this envelope it smells like you and I can't be without that scent, It's filling me with all you mean to me to me." -living in your letters

I love DC, they put a mark in my life...though some people say that they are way too depressing. For me, Chris Carraba is genious since his further seems forever days. Screaming deadly:)

Candles - Hey Monday


Favorite line:

"Been black and blue before
There’s no need to explain
I am not the jaded kind
Playback’s such a waste
You’re invisible
Invisible to me
My wish is coming true
Erase the memory of your face"

Nice music. Nice Lyrics! Cassade of Hey Monday live @ Popstar Magazine

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Di lang ikaw (emo sa LRT)

Early morning, may be around 645am. Hehe.. Abad Santos. Maluwang naman yung tren. Skip train kasi. Skip ba o Escape? Bahala na kayo.hehehe.. Para sa akin, Skip train.

Nakaupo ako kasi nga maluwang diba. Tayuman. Me magandang babae na sumakay. May be around 5 flat lang ang height nya. Pagtititigan mo sya maganda sya. Lalo na para sa akin. hehehe. Simple lang naman ang suot niya. "Full Black" naka converse na sneakers pa.. hehe. "Emo Punk" eka nga nila. Maputi siya kaya bagay naman. Nakapusod buhok astig tapos yung porma nya parang pang korean ung may vest. este ewan ko ba kung anung tawag dun. Tapos me nakapasak sa tenga nya. Earphone.

Doroteo Jose., Madaming sumakay sa doroteo. Umusog sya ng ilang hakbang papalapit sa akin. Naririnig ko na yung tugtog niya. Tinitingnan ko siya para siyang bumubulong. Kumakanta pala. Mejo na palakas. "This heart it beats, beats for only you. My heart is yours". Aba My Heart ng Paramore. Astig.

Pedro Gil. Medyo maluwang na. Bumaba na si miss emo. Napansin ko me nakatali na bandage sa left wrist nya. hehe. "shit emo nga"

Quirino. Naisip ko yung mga araw na ganun din ako. Tinititigan ko siya at nakita ko na ganun din ako dati. Tanging mga kanta lang ang pakiramdam ko na nakakaintindi sa nararamdaman ko. Maaring Until now me ganun pa akong natitira ung SO EMO na part.. Sa puso at isip - emo. Hehehe. Nararamdaman ko yung lungkot niya. Alam mo naman mga emo. Kita agad, Hehehe..

Gil Puyat. Babaaan na. Sakay ng bus. Naisip ko. Di lang pala ako ang malungkot sa mundo. Sasabihin ko sana sa kanya "Hindi lang ikaw ang emo" wag mo sirain buhay mo dahil lang sa pag eemo. Miserable ka na nga ppka miserable ka pa. Naisip ko. Oo galit ako sa kanya kasi lahat binigay ko pero parang wala pa din yun para sa kanya pero ano pang magagawa ko eh sa totoo namang mahal ko siya? mahal ko lahat ng tungkol sa kanya.? kahit masakit?. Ganun talaga ang buhay.

Well take this

"Hindi lang ikaw ang emo sa mundo kaya ayusin mo buhay mo. Pakamatay ka na lng kung di mo nakikita na me mga tao pa sa paligid mo na handang magmahal sayo. Don't be a looser. I mean - don't loose hope. Soon you'll get what you deserve. God has always something good in reserve. Hope and Pray."

Paseo na. Baba na ako. Isusulat ko na lng ang mga salitang ito sa blog ko. Sana mabasa mo;)

Explain the Unexplainable(Favorite Lines)

I am writing these not to put agony or harm for anybody. But i am searching for some explanations in life and i stumbled on this quotes that gives explanation and realization why some uncertainty happens in someone's life.

The following lines were taken from authors, bloggers and even lyrics.!lol

“Kung hindi mo mahal ang isang tao, wag ka nang magpakita ng motibo para mahalin ka nya..” - Bob Ong
--Siguro nga. Sabi ko nga ke Kreng. Masanay ka na mag dump ng guys. Kesa naman mag maganda ka pa kung ayaw mo naman talaga sya. At lis isang sakitan lang. Magic word lang yan. At least di mo siya pinaasa.hehe

"Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure." -Oprah
--Nice quote. Today is the only thing that we have. Today is painful. People just cant smile and say "okay" tapos okay na lahat. Di ganun kadali yun.

"I know that you have left me, I cannot promise not to cry, But I do love you my friend,I guess this is my last goodbye." -Amanda Linzi
--Well said. No explanations needed.

"I've got to walk away while there's still hope. Learn to erase the love I know and let you go cause what I thought was love was only lies. Taking what you want, left me behind as my heart dies" - Last Goodbye by Trading Yesterday

--People should believe on hope. Dont be afraid to let go. Keep believing for a better tomorrow.

"Pu**** Ina naman basha. Ang tigas mo naman...Mahal na Mahal kita. Ang sakit sakit na"
- Popoy to Basha, One more chance
--Siguro nga ganun ka Pu**** Ina ka mahal ni popoy si bash.hehehe  

Suggest your favorite lines people. Feel free to post back and comment!



Time to stop.

When the pain is excruciating. Stop it!

Its 4:23 PM., Monday September 7th of 2009

Rainy Afternoon.

Special Non Working Holiday

STOP IT. Ill stop my heart now.

Ill find a place where i can lay and give my heart for others insensitivity.

Ill give my life to those who needs ressurection          

Thats good enough to hear those words. I am the only fucking person that must be blame. I put my self on this situation. I should have never dreamed of things that was never meant to be mine. I should have listened to people's words instead of listening to my stupid heart. I'm the most fucking stupid person who believed in so much love. A love story that's only meant for movies.

It was never a mistake. Its a risk taken by me. Its a choice that i put myself into.

I did everything i can but now i know i should stop. Ill take some high dosage of "bitter-pills" and lie down on the floor. Ill crush down the house that i wanted to give you and built another new. Ill buy a car and take my lover for a ride. Ill work on photography and discover how beautiful life is offering me. Ill change my phone number and get away for an escape. I don't need anyone's advice because Ive been here so many times.

For now ill make a stop. Thank you.

facebook quiz "What's your biggest weakness"

"You are often loved because of your outgoing and fun personality, and you like to give hugs and flirt, but underneath of it all you are lacking heart. You find it hard to love others through all the walls you've built around your heart from being hurt so much throughout life, but you want to love, you desperately want that fun, romance that you see in others, but you don't know if you can have it in your current circumstances. You want stability, but at the same time you need change. You go from one extreme to another and often feel overwhelmed when you can't figure out something. You think about your life often and how you can improve your character. You find it hard to settle, but you really want to. You just feel like you need to find that balance, that heart that you've been missing for so long. You need to love through the pain, but it's so hard. But the walls need to crumble for you to truly be YOU."                                                                                                                                   

-quiz results in fb what's your weakness

"You are often loved because of your outgoing and fun personality" Yeah. That's how i hide my self.

"You find it hard to love others through all the walls you've built around your heart from being hurt so much throughout life" YeahI find it hard. I can't let go of those painful shits that happened into my life.

"you want to love, you desperately want that fun, romance that you see in others, but you don't know if you can have it in your current circumstances" Yeah. I want it but she just cant give it. The longer i wait the more things get complicated.

"You want stability, but at the same time you need change." Yeah. I want new beginnings but how can it be if things can't end.

"You just feel like you need to find that balance, that heart that you've been missing for so long." Yeah. I don't know how but i wont give up on finding it

Very nice Facebook Quiz, very

Dear Emo Friend

Dearest Reon,

Hello there,

Its been a while since i last saw your tears. At last i'm going to have quiet nights that i could sleep and not to think if you are shedding tears underneath your eyelids. You changed my life by letting me in through the deepest space inside your heart. I remember that day when you asked me to wrote you a poem, so that you can hear what my tied tongue has to say. It took me 6 hours to put a smile on your pretty face as i stand shaking in front of you while reading those words written in a small piece of paper. It's not hard to get it, you smiled at me like we are on a Romeo and Juliet play and that's the start of what we called "new beginnings".

We were wrong. We became more miserable. We cant keep up to the pace that life has given us. I became more busy and busy just to give you those promises that i made. I did not notice that the time flies as i make a sprint towards our dream life. I want you to know that i do regret those times that i could sit beside you and have a chalk talk with you. Ask you how was your day and how many bullshits you run unto.

Now our life has changed. You're gone. You took away everything that life has to gave you. But i know your happier now. Stay happy now. I know you are safe where ever you may be. Let me live a more miserable life without you. Soon ill be there. Ill rest in your arms and tell you stories about our lives.

I miss you. Soon ill be with you.

                                                                                                                   ---your emo friend

Mind or Heart? Real love

Someone asked me this and it kept bugging my mind last night. "Where does real love exist?" he told me that for him real love is only on peoples mind. To make it clearly what he said is

"Tol ang real love ba, sa puso o sa utak lang?. Para sa akin kasi sa utak lang" All i said is this

"Tol para sa akin kung real love yan it should exist in your heart. Yun bang parang busog na busog ka kahit wala ka kinakain."

How can i say that i know what real love if i didn't even have an experience to be loved by the person i love the most. Sad but true. I never had any such good experience when it comes to love. If i'm not rejected i always get left behind. I don't even have legal papers to talk about

May be this real love i have right now is only in my mind. I'm so selfish. I tie my self into her even i'm just a friend for her. I care for her even it's meaningless for her. I guess this love is only on my mind and not on my heart. Kreng told me once that love is all about affection. "di totoo yung sabi nila na kung mahal mo ang isang tao, wag ka mag demand. Mahalin mo lang siya" One way or another you'll ask for it. The reality? You'll end up crying on your pillow asking yourself what more to do to be loved back. And it's true. If this is real i should learn to free my self and free her.

I passed by on this blogpost saying these lines:
"True love is a choice, not a feeling. Sure, the feelings will be there at times, but they won't be there all the time. True love is CHOOSING your partner, even during the times when the feelings aren't there."

Real love do exist in the heart but it doesn't mean that you'll end up happily ever after with that real love that you are keeping. Sometimes love isn't just good enough to make someone love you back. See the real picture. Magnify your real life.

"di ka pa mapapakaen ng I love you"

Grow up a little more. Don't be excited. We have so much things in front of us. Live life with real love that is deeply rooted in your heart. "passion"


Ulan Payong Diskette on Mondays Tsismis at hirit ITIS Mam Bea 7 Mountains SMS Lecheplan Comment ni sadang Amanamin Itlogpugo Maalat Place to be sa me tapat ng sv 210 sulat kiss sa buhok baller id thesis topic mam daligdig Comp sci dep Mcdonalds church baclaran hagdan sa lrt sv grounds comp iyakan perdi edsa hbc moa bag na yellow ni mager hh vindicated antok akap ba yan? moa seaside walkathon sa sm manila city hall walls sa intramuros piatos at vcut sem break tangina iniingatan naman kita ha nicaduds un lrt rogui interogation 1st legal date nauwi sa away california maki ni zoe human slippers php project bahay ni mager dedmahan retreat house akap paa sa bus green and red angels robin at cheche riot ds bahay hoodies sun cellular cake ni robin tampororot sa moa starbucks 8 years picture balik loob now or never meet buddy orange cab bracelet na strap razons aircon bday ni jessica amblvd violet 7eleven jolibee za and sbarro sam egg ihip sa likod di na ba tayo magkikita share sa payong hawak sa arms kausap si mama bday mo itlog ni ate ever cake na me oreo pamangkin havs taxi bulong tanong di ko alam beso wag na okay na....To be continued?

These words simply reminds me of you. Hmmm...